#Gotta still draw the banner lol

[the-missing-piece-game]

i literally cannot wait for this game <3

Ah thank you! 😊 I know it’s in the beginning stages but I’m just happy to make a game for all Saw fans alike!

[babacontainsmultitudes]

Not much has been shared yet for the Nicky day of the week which has me thinking that *I* wanna draw a Nicky to share but... That would require... Drawing and... Liking what I draw...

[13thdoodle]

[ EctoberHaunt 2024 Banner ]

Hi hiii~ I get to draw the banner again for @ectoberhaunt this year~ It was a lot of fun :DD

I wasn't sure how to incorporate the gold and silver at first but I think it turn out pretty good

Also thank you to Enn for helping me with the flats I would've pewished ksjadnaksj Sketches and some ramblings under cut

Here's the initial sketch for the banner. I tried my best to keep it close to the sketch or at least have the same energy (hopefully qwq)

As you can see, I drew Sam and Tucker riding a scooter bike originally. But the banner, I try to get as close to canon design as possible. I could not for the live of me remember what episode has the scooter bike. And.. turns out I might've just misremembered the scooter as a motor bike? so I just draw the scooter lol

(This is from the Killer Garage Sale episode btw. I couldn't find the scooter's pict on the wiki so I gotta screenshot it from the episode)

Also speaking of couldn't find reference pictures in the fandom wiki,

I couldn't find pictures of the college trio full body screenshots there. Only the Vlad leaning into the portal while Maddie and Jack looked away. Very useful references, yes.

I used to think that Jack was the worst one here about lab safety (considering he was the main reason the portal exploded on Vlad's face), but Maddie is no better after watching the episode again. Girlie wear big round earrings and leg warmers in the lab. Pretty sure that's... not very safety. Vlad is not better since he does lean very close into the radiation portal so... lol

Anyway, I tried to incorporate their dynamics in the banner. Jack the very excited one and leading the ghost hunt, Maddie following along with more ghost gears, and Vlad... well, I was thinking Vlad could be the 'rational' of the trio and like brings stuffs the other two wouldn't have thought to bring out of excitement (i.e. flashlights in case they need to go through pitch black tunnel so they don't fall off etc etc)

But... you know, that's giving Vlad too many points than he deserves lol. So, I draw Vlad still bringing the bag of extra stuffs, but it's not fully closed so some stuffs fell off on their trails. They all should share braincells and Vlad does not get a turn lol

Also changed Maddie's clothes and give her the teal suit to match Jack and also looks better when she's running

There's not much I can say about the main trio process? I mostly just want Sam to be the one driving the scooter while Tucker handles the navigations or sth. They get to ride scooters to catch up with Danny~

Danny and Tucker's colors a bit ashy bc I color picked them from low res screenshots askjdnaksj I fixed em on the final tho so yea

O yeah, I don't know if it's visible on the final art, but I initially try to give the kids warm shadings and cold lighting (Silver), and the college trio cold shadows and warm lighting (Gold) to fit the themes.

Also the light source.. sorta? The adults has the light source from behind them bc they are in past/past the age in the drawings? And the kids has their light source from in front of them, going into the future and the many things ahead of them kajsdnaksd

[distant--shadow]

The witch and the widow chapters 1-4 author’s notes

Ok, so first off I feel I gotta preface this by saying I am absolutely not a history buff. Kinda the opposite of one really. I was one of less than 10% of the kids in my year of 300 or so that didn’t take history at GCSEs, mostly caus a subject taught and based around names and dates etc is the definition of something not suited for my type of brain, also I hugely lost interest in it caus we moved past the fun trebuchet eras and all that real fast and it became of slog of me falling asleep in lessons caus I had a teacher whose method was putting on movies and shutting the blinds (I’d always fall asleep and he was later jailed for being a p*edophile, so that’s a thing.) Anyway, all that to say I’m not good at this shit, but as ive gotten older I have taken a bigger interest in queer history in particular, and that often if not always links into other areas such as fashion, women’s rights, religion,the arts, class, and race etc. (I’m still not good at names and dates though!)

They are outfitted and arsenalled - the stones of the wall - in a manner to rival any army; tapestries of red and gold perhaps once brandished on battlefield as banners promenading around death now retired and indoor-still-air-still as taxidermy giving colour between all of the shades of metal, burnished and polished and in some cases rusting, some still purposefully left blood-stained, swords and pikes and maces arranged in wallpaper patterns as though flowers or fans, sword-sheath beams spreading from chest-plate armour suns.

Let’s start with something easy and recent. The Baron’s armoury was inspired by a few castles I’ve visited, these rooms are always so bizarre to me. I don’t know if this is at all of the time/how they were decorated or a more recent thing, but either way it’s pretty wild but I do love the visual and metaphor of it. In this one castle I found out from talking about the carpentry to an attendant that the decorative ceiling work around the chandelier above the dining room table actually hid a trapdoor - and there was other hidden doorways for passages and to secret rooms in this castle, that’s not that unusual - but this particular trapdoor was to allow for the chandeliers to be switched out. Why? Caus they had them in multiple colours of glass, and the lady of the castle liked the chandelier to co-ordinate with her dress if they were having guests round. Aint that such a flex? Definitely some food for future thought.

Aight. Clothing. So anyone that chats fic/au to me or is in my server has probably heard me yell to go watch Kaz Rowe’s videos many times. As I’ve said this fic aint meant to be historically accurate but it does kinda straddle histories, one of which being our own; so women wearing trousers and the like at this time would still be a crime, and draw a lot of attention . Imogen in men’s clothing genuinely isn’t meant to be much of a gender thing but a thing of practicality, and she has mostly lived in the countryside or in the outskirts, so she does not get into the trouble she would should she go into the towns and cities (another reason to keep away past the potential noise, but this Imogen will happily don a dress or skirts if she needs to, she’s just usually working – and maybe it’s a bonus that dressing as a man acts as a sort of flagging for any women who might be interested lol.)

I guess here I should mention how I think this version of Imogen's powers and how they’ve manifested (along with everyone else being unaware of them) will have somewhat changed her disposition and personality, it is a lot more aligned with later campaign Imogen who has more confidence and empowerment, she hasn’t been ostracised for her abilities or particularly bombarded by them, think more like when she has her circlet on, she chooses to listen in (mostly), although of course she has still heard many terrible things (and her life has still been pretty brutal but that’s to be written still).

(it’ll be really fun in this regard getting to explore and explain this version of Laudna, but early days for giving much away on that yet!)

Her skirts are full and structured and plumed by many layers of petticoats that hide the movement of her feet across the wildflower lawn, causing her to appear to be drifting like the bees do from petal to petal, pollen dusting her pleats though ghostly her skin in contrast to the fine fabrics that she dresses for the part, black in mourning, still, bodice tight and sleeve leg of mutton, an ornate decorative layer of black lace laying over each yard of textured textile like spider webs on porcelain patterns, her husband's tableware collecting dust in the kitchen cupboard.

real impractical for how tending towards practical the Lady dares to be, hands on, too busy for errant hairs in piano key ivory and ebony windswept and loose from the high bun she pins in place with a cameo broach, a memento mori engraved in silver and inlayed with ruby eyes and tied with red ribbons. Her skin also proudly displays the age and perhaps trauma that her hair does, lines from laughter and furrowed brows and the feet of the crows that cry from the top of the chimney pots

A little note as to say that Laudna’s appearance is heavily influenced by Victorian mourning wear, with some of the clothes cuts altered to be a little bit more regency and earlier in places. (her  attire is a little outdated, further suggesting her distancing from society and fashion)

A couple of days ago Imogen happened upon a bird with an injured wing, crying helplessly and rolling in circles, feathers taking flight away from the bird that could not, settling around it as it panicked itself bald-

The bird could not live without the use of its wing, and it didn’t, whether that was by Prosciutto or a fox, only its feathers were left in a pile.

Imogen had gathered them into an empty burlap sack; taken them to one of the maids downstairs to clean, repurpose them for filling pillows.

Here’s a silly little easter egg for my p(r)oof reader. Last time he visited we was enjoying a cinnamon roll from the local bakery by the city river (as you do) and a cyclist hit a seagull. It was real distressing, the seagull was distressed too. A handfull of middle aged women stood around it not wanting or knowing how to intervene as its wing was twisted at a crazy angle and it flapped about in a pile of its own feathers, there’s still bird flu about so it is wise to not touch wild birds, and as bleak as it is I was saying to freshy that a wild bird who’s wings broken like that is gonna die, and probably slowly and painfully. Some man came along and lifted up the bird to take the bird off the path and laid it to rest behind an old bridge building, I think he must have mercy killed it too as the bird was already dead when we walked past 10 or so minutes later after finishing our cinnamon roll and giving a cautious glance. So there’s a nice happy memory thrown in there for him.

what appears to be driftwood breaches the surface, then another point, then another

the water belches

Ceviche scares, whinnying as he rears onto his back legs, the Lady leaning forward and clinging to his harness. Imogen stands in her stirrups, leaning across the gap over to the black stallion, grasping his reins and cooing

“All good, boy, all good-”

What had appeared to be driftwood lands on the surface with a slap, looking like the carcass of an old boat left to rot in the muddy bed of a dock, timber ribcaged and leathered skin cladding.

A femur surfaces, followed by a jaw.

Second easter egg for the p(r)oof is a quick one (I’m such a considerate writer, I know.) On a train ride to a loch we went to for a day out there is a stop that is on another lake/body of water, and right by the train tracks (which are at water height) there are 4 or 5 old ships stuck in the mud, most of them just the frames/structures of the old boats, mostly wood and some bits of metal, but they’re pretty big boats! It really looks like whale carcasses. I’ve always wanted to get of there and check it out, and we were gonna stop by on the way back but my health being what it is was giving me some grief that day so we missed 2 trains and then soon the daylight, so hopefully next time buddy.

There’s alotta meat and gore talk and Imogen being a vegetarian without the label for such is just another way of me playing round with all of her complex feelings about what the Lady might be doing, her feelings towards Angharad butchering and nourishing the women with these communal stews and all of that. I’ve been vegetarian myself for 20 years now, and it was all triggered by an existential crisis in my mid teens (still a huge fan of leather and blood though) – Imogen greatly cares about animals, struggles with the thought of anything being slaughtered, she is in some ways more empathetic than most because she knows those she does on so much more of a personal level, really feels how someone is reacting to a situation they are in, but also because of this she knows humans are often corrupt and vile and she is spared such thoughts from animals, only knows their instincts and the love and comfort and service they bring – and yet she will obsess over the Lady’s (potential) tooling on that saddlework leather that’s really fucking brutal if she thinks about it one way and beautiful if she thinks about it another hmmm what if everything’s not black and white.

Oh, and the stew is a homage to @picturesofthegoneworlds’ pre-campaign fic Intertwined which I am lucky enough to co-parent and her writing is hugely influential on mine.

There’s a few things being bread crumb trailed here that I can’t explain in the author notes yet, but I’m looking forward to when I can. One small detail I will give away is just a silly thing about the chapter headings. They are something of significance from within the chapter, given in its ‘proper’ name – maybe someone gets access to some books to do research at some point?

anyways, thanks @astoriacolumnstaircase for enabling me. will do another post like this for future chapters if folks find it interesting.

[delusional-mishaps]

well guys. since i missed epic's birthday (devastating) have some headcanons :)

he is one of those weaboos who learned japanese so he can watch anime "the authentic way" (his words)

so he's fluent in japanese 💀 he literally only learned it for anime but dude was DEDACTED

he's so cringe guys 😭 i can say that. he's my boyfriend i love him

he would adore those cute anime girl v-tubers. like not in a weird way but he'd watch a lot of them

HE PLAYS GENSHIN 💀 he'd probably main beidou or raiden shogun/ei.. maybe run a full electro team with miko and fischl too 😭 (fischl is his fave character he loves her backstory and her bird thing idk i dont use fischl 💀) he loves the electro characters for some reason idk

HE HAS THE WORST LUCK ON THIS GAME THO. bro has c6 diluc (me too ☹️) and all his artifacts SUCK ASS even tho he'll grind every day

he has to spend money on every banner because he always loses his 50/50 and only gets high pity

ok enough genshin headcanons he's cringe we know this

im here ranting about a game i hate because my dumb boyfriend plays it so much

he hangs out with cross a lot ofc BUT

whenever he hears the word cross used in any context he turns to cross like "CROSS????? BRUH THATS YOU!!" (i always make these jokes. im projecting)

cant believe jesus died on his best friend fr... LMAOOO

he speedruns minecraft. he's NOT GOOD AT IT. but he can do it

he's had his speedruns ruined by creepers like 7 times

one time he somehow got into the deep dark and got killed by the warden??? idk what bro was doing down there in a speedrun dawg 😭

sorry he's a gamer in my head but hes really bad at every game he plays (just like me fr)

he sleeps under like 6 different weighted blankets in the hopes that he wont thrash around when he sleeps but he's too strong and ends up tossing them all off his bed 😭

bro needs to be CRUSHED to fall asleep!! he literally cant fall asleep without the weight

not that he likes to sleep anyway because of the nightmares but whatever. hes gotta do it. unfortunately.

he fights in his dreams ofc thats like canon but bro is throwing punches in his sleep fr

if he gets a partner (me fr!!) they gotta sleep in a different ROOM 😭 he is taking NO CHANCES and tbh thats so fair i wouldnt wanna wake up being beaten up by my bf

he is so ipad baby-core <3 he'll just watch youtube on his ipad all day if u let him but he's an old man and needs his spectacles otherwise he's holding it at arm's length 💀

don't forget bro is literally a doctor?? he's SO smart but he uses his goofy persona as a cover up

im convinced like most of the people that know him actually dont know this. they all think hes dumb as bricks 💀

them he'll casually say smth super smart and everyone is like ???????? HELLO??? SINCE WHEN DID UR BRAIN WORK??

i love drawing epic with glasses guys he looks so cute. but he has old man reading glasses

this the typa shit he wears

AND HE FUCKING. anime glasses 😭

like yk how ppl in anime push glasses up

him fr

AUUGH WHY IS HE SO CRINGE I NEED TO CRUSH HIM

he actually needs his glasses all the time but he doesnt like to look like a NERDD so he doesnt wear them

he makes cross read everything for him

they go out to eat and gotta make him read the whole menu otherwise hes holding it 2cm from his face 💔

"whatd that sign say i cant read it"

"dude the letters are huge how cant you read it"

"oh lol i need my glasses my bad bruh"

"YOU ARE DRIVING A CAR RIGHT NOW????"

actually he cant legally drive. because thats funnier than if he could

id still be his passenger princess <3 i refuse to get my license

anyway guys isnt my boyfriend so silly

im so tiredni needto seelp goodnight smooork mimimumumu

its 3am i neednto get up in 5 hours naioiiooooooo

goodbye guys enhjoy my boyfrien mdgrf

[uglypastels]

Hey i loved your logan fics and was wondering which other xmen you'd write for? Also, do you have a masterlist? Hope you're well

Hiii 💖💖💖 so i'm currently rewatching the movies and stuff so while I get through all that I'm still picking and choosing which of them are my blorbos

Atm i'm open to write for

Logan Howlett/Wolverine

Remy LeBeau/Gambit (based on the animated series)

Wade Wilson/Deadpool

And it can be Fluff, Angst or Smut

With more probably being soon added to the list 😊

And as far as the Masterlist, i wanted to wait with making it til I had a few works to add to it coz I can't stand an empty list lol, and now i just gotta charge my tablet and draw the banner, so most likely it will be up tomorrow if not tonight

Hope you're having a lovely day 🥰

[greydoesthearts]

What are some of your more self-indulgent headcanons?

Ooooh, honestly I was thinking about some of my older fun ones this morning so yippee!!

Self-indulgent and projecting are kinda the same thing right? Agskgsk well here's a more indulgent one anyway:

Jackie (not sure about TSI Jackie but at least my version) buys online fan-merch of himself and leaves pleasant reviews about the shops!! There's even a couple he frequents and he always tips well (within his budget ofc). He's got a whole banner dedicated to pins, a thing of keychains, fanart on the wall of his room, tshirts for everybody--the list goes on :) (Seán even reblogged an art I made about this for Jackie week way back when so canon? 👀 /j)

Another old one is that Marvin likes foxes about as much as he likes cats; he had a magic rescue fox named Scout at some point in my past drawings--I think the reasoning was because they're sly and shit lol I haven't thought about that in a while though!! Also new hc that Jackie likes hyenas because they're my new favourite animal agsksgk

Most of my disability headcanons on the egos are self-indulgent and projections (I've still gotta make a separate post about them all soon ahem)

This turned into just a Marvin and Jackie post but I mean I do have the most headcanons about them for the sole reason they're my faves lmao

[ambrosialdesire]

how much more does csp slap than procreate? wanna know if i should buy it

hmmm i haven't used csp pro as much recently cause of how busy i am, only for achelous's banner and the new references for my ocs, but if you're currently using procreate or any other drawing app that doesn't have a complicated-looking interface, the interface and controls for csp can be difficult to understand. there's kind of a learning curve to get over, i had to look up a youtube tutorial on how to edit the interface to my liking when i first bought it lmfao but the brushes are SUPER nice with all the different textures, and the blending is so interesting to learn how to use since i rarely use the blending/smearing tool in procreate cause i have a difficult time understanding how to use it. the pieces i made so far come out crispy clear on my phone when i send it, which is personally amazing cause i always zoom in and inspect each little detail to see if i missed anything. AND YK HOW IN PROCREATE WHEN YOU BARELY ADJUST THE LINE DURING TRANSFORMING, IT BLURS TO SHIT???? IT DOESN'T REALLY DO THAT AT ALL FOR CSP, THAT SHITS GENUINELY A BLESSING. also i found out how to kinda use the 3d models, so i can do more dynamic poses AND practice my anatomy. genuinely, i really find csp quite an upgrade from procreate due to how many features it contains, BUT i still enjoy using procreate.

i don't have csp on my ipad and as much as i want to for accessibility purposes (i don't have the ability to bring my drawing tablet on me all the time + the wires are a hassle to set up, just imagine setting up in public when you already don't like being in public spaces for a long time, esp with what you draw 😭), you got me immensely fucked up if you think i'm doing a subscription instead of a one and done payment like procreate and csp on my laptop. procreate is mad convenient, i can doodle whatever i want with it, even while taking notes at the same time if i am using it for notes. i use gumroad to find most, if not all my brushes and it's so fun shopping for them like the csp brushes. i'm also super used to how each brush i use works cause i've been using it for nearly 4 years now, and ik how to work around certain elements to my liking, esp the liquify tool cause the liquify tool on csp lags and sometimes does not "listen" to what i'm trying to do with the drawing. i feel like procreate is sorta beginner friendly for digital art, ik other people say otherwise cause it is pretty lackluster compared to other professional digital art programs, but that's just what i think. also i like speedpainting process videos, i just watch them whenever i want to and remember what i was thinking or feeling during a particular moment in it.

all in all, i heavily believe that it's just personal preference on what feels the best and works right for you, because i went through many different drawing apps/prgrams before i finally settled on csp, procreate, and sai (on occasion lol). you also gotta make a heavy financial decision on csp if you're choosing to do either the pro or the ex version, but i'd wait until the discounts come out again if you choose to purchase csp. i think there's the free trial for csp to see if you rock with the interfaces/controls as well before settling on one or the other ‼️‼️

i ain't a big professional or particularly nit-picky on what i think is overall the best, i simply love making art with whatever media i'm using 🙇‍♂️

[ask-the-lumiose-thief]

[Insert cool banner here]

Welcome to ask-the-lumiose-theif! This is a Pokémon ask blog about a Pikachu with a bad case of sticky fingers. This blog will be plot based, with its story being driven in part by character interactions.

Updates may be sporadic, but this blog is active!

This blog is in the same universe as @ask-my-memoir !

Click or tap "keep reading" to see more.

⭐️ Current Chapter: TBA

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⭐️ Navigation:

About | IC Only | Rules | Characters | Tags

⭐️ Other Blogs of Mine

@ask-my-memoir | another pokeask blog i run!

@tallahatchet | my main!

@gladiator-v | my art/mod blog

⭐️ About the Mod

Heyo, I'm V! (20 yrs old, she/her) I like to draw and make characters and worlds, yanno the whole artist shtick. I've been hanging around the community since 2018-19 ish, and only recently worked up the courage to make my first blog (like last year in December recently). I'm pretty chill, though I am on the quieter side in the spaces I frequent. (unless I'm gushing about something lol)

Footnotes:

Totally not me wanting to have a second blog with a main character who's easier to draw that spawned from me getting re-hyperfixated on Pokken Tournament. Nah, toootally not.

BUT ON A SERIOUS NOTE-

I love my stupid grumpy fox man so, so much but I just wanted to try my hand at something else! For a change!! So yeah poof here we go again. His blog will still continue don't worry! I just gotta let my brain have what it wants lol

[notfivefr]

22092025- Media diary or whatever #7

1) Game — Reverse 1999 : : (uninstall Enstar for this)

Reinstall this game bcs my tl sometimes show me r1999 stuff and it feeds my urge to play it. I installed this game when there was like 3 days left bfore their annv update, Windsong banner. Mcm biasa, gacha game got that returnee missions n stuff. I played bit of Windsong's story: abt a researcher conducts a leyline field research at a tiny snowy town. I don't really remember the plot of main story, so need to watch some recap on yt.

Gosh i forgot how beautiful this game artstyle is, and the ui too??? Whenever i play the story, i felt like crying like damn gorgeous art they need to release artbook fr.

Im speedrunning this game okayy,, reached player level 30, leveled up 6 of my characters (Sonetto, Dikke, APPle, Lucy, Getian, Bloodbourn) to Insight II, 2 episodes for main story, settled the beginner mission etc etc. Also new 6 stars characters i got so far are Windsong, Lucy, Getian (from annv banner), Toothfairy, Sotheby, Regulus, Ezra in span of 50 pulls honestly im tweaking (OKAYY HELP wtf is going on?? ). Also free 6star character, Semmelweis.

——— HSR : :

Omg i did so much. Finished Penacony's main story, Ruan Mei's story (I hate that damn bug with passion) , Topaz's story and otw Wardance's story. Kafka is considered fully build for me (my woman hitting that 45k raw burst dmg on average), half- build Jingyuan, Pela, tralblazer, robin etc. Istg building characters in hsr is actually diabolical it takes at least 2 months per character,, 240 resins per day is not enough. Especially to farm those damn relics.

At least i got my Robin tho. (She's sooo wife 🥰🥰)

2.5 banner with blackswan and Robin ;^; i need blackswan to make kafka team tho (istg if 2.6 banner got aventurine rerun imma uh idk bcs 2.7 is Sunday's patch i really cant choose honestly. Do i willingly wait for other aventurine rerun that idk how long we gotta wait or fomo bc im not Sunday's 1st gen haver :(((( )

Sunday

——— Genshin : :

Nothing much, i logged in, used resin (im still farming for mualani rn), claimed daily rewards. Not really played that much atm bcs for some reasons my ping just spiked up to 999ms whenever it enters battle mode idk what to do. Pissing me off honestly 😭. I need a new phone i guess.

Also 13 Sept is Albedo's birthday. Forcing my self to draw something bcs it's an obligation at this point.

This is actually my first time drawing his hair with reference in this 3 yrs.

2) vcr minecraft

Me keep refreshing my tl to translate their clip contexts lol. It's so funn need more vcr stuff. I love when everyone interact w each other. I think the most memorable one are, drunk Kanaria, izuru's team shenanigans, and i love the way izuru shows his gremlin side to other people outside of holostar. (i only watch izr idk everyone else lmao) Also the way they played LoL together after the server closed??? Hsshhs Sendo yuuhi is so cute and day1 is so funny. I genuinely hope they're friends now. Need more of their contents in the future.

—-—-—

That's all ig? Only spend my time grinding in games besides the irl stuff. Im going all out before intern ni. Before i got too overwhelmed to do other stuff gitu.

[nemo-of-house-hamartia]

omg now way. omg now way.

no way.

APPLE PIE IS MY FAVOURITE DESSERT IN THIS WHOLE WORLD. AND THAT LOOKS SO SO SO DELICIOUS.

omgomgomgomg thank you so so so so much!! does happy dance

accepts it gratefully and scarfs it down because it's SO SO GOOD

also, please, keep rambling and keep talking because dear gods, I absolutely adore Genshin and listening and having the chance to talk about it with someone that equally adore it is PERFECTION. And omgomgom writing fics about it??? ok, I am all for it. I am ready. I am mostly brainstorming around and drawing about it (cannot seem to stop the brain long enough to put words down), but I am always up for chitchatting about fanfictions and stories! :D

This game is truly everything. I have the soundtrack in my spotify downloaded list because I listen so much to it, it's just everything. And honestly, YES. The roaming around to discover all these beautiful places (gotta admit, Mondstadt is still very much my favorite among the 4 regions we have as of now, with Liyue coming close second. Even when I have quests to take care of, I am always so happy to just be in Mondstadt, and truly wished we have more quests and events revolving around the City of Wind and Song).

and omg your choice of favourites is EVERYTHING.

I am so sad to admit that I do not have Albedo in my roster (am saving up those primos hoping that we will get his banner again soon, because I need to have all the Mondstadt characters, and as of now, I am missing a few lol), BUT KAEYA. KAEYA HAS BEEN THERE FROM WHEN I FIRST STARTED PLAYING AND I AM NOT PLANNING OF HAVING HIM GO ANYWHERE. Like, I seriously adore his character, and I am so so intrigued by his story, I cannot wait to see him in the upcoming version 3.5. I saw some leaks and omgomgomgomgomgomg I cannot wait. As for who my favourite are, allow me to show you my current team, which is made up of all the bebes I love the most (tho, as you said, I have truly an hard time not liking everyone because each character is likable in their own way!)

LIKE. HERE ARE THE BEBES I LOVE AND ADORE. Seriously, Zhongli and Diluc are the ones that are neck and neck for who I like the most, and then I have Kaeya and then Venti (because I just love his attitude. He is a little shit (most affectionate), and I can get enough of his antics. ALSO, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT WHEN ALBEDO WALKED AROUND YOU COULD HEAR THE SMALL CLINKING, omg that is downright adorable!! and have you noticed that when you are looking at the characters in their menus, you can hear the sound of the elemental vision?? Like, I didn't notice at first, because I was playing with the PS4, so unless the volume was at max, it was impossible to hear. But then I was playing on the PC as well, with my earbuds on, and THAT'S when I noticed it and I was all "omgomgomgomgomgomg". Seriously, this game is just beyond amazing, I am honestly so in love with it. The only thing is that I am F2P, which means that I have to grind a lot to get those primos, and sometimes (i.e. almost always) I don't have enough to pull for the characters I want. So I need to plan carefully with both the whole Pity System and just wait up and not risk it. But I have to be honest, as of now I got all the characters I truly truly wanted (I am only missing Mona, Jean and Hu Tao that I truly truly want, but don't have, so I am hoping that I will be able to get them soon enough, tbh), so I cannot complain :D

as for the events, the Lantern Rite is MOST DEFINITELY one of my favourite, because Liyue is just absolutely breathtaking during this event, and seeing all the lanterns floating up is just so dreamy (plus, LORE ABOUT XIAO AND ZHONGLI, so I am all for it. I always in it to know more about darling Zhongli and bebe Xiao,) and the other one is the Weinlesefest (dear gods, the tears I poured for dearest Razor during that event) and Windblume, but this one I was too late for the game to actually play it, so I only watched the cutscene on youtube. But I am truly hoping for it to be back, because I NEED TO SEE MONDSTADT ALL DECORATED AND GO AROUND TOWN AND MEET ALL THE MONDSTADT CHARACTERS. What about you, what are your favourite events???? :D And please, do not hesitate to ramble, because seriously, Genshin is awesome and I love to chitchat about it with another fellow estimator of the game!! :D

Morning morning!!

Coming in to bring something good to drinm and munch on!

Also, i saw that you are into Genshin???😁😁 me too!!! I just adore that game!!! 🤩Who is your favourite character, if you don't mind me asking??😁😁

Ohhhh thank you! Please have a piece of apple pie in return! Made it myself last night :D

Genshin is such a good game! I love the music, I love the exploring, I love the lore, I love te soundtrack! (And writing silly little fics about it all :D)

Favorite character is a hard question, hmmmm... aaaa there's so many good characters but I think Kaeya and Albedo :D I just love the way Kaeya talks and all the backstory that goes with his past. And if the leaks can be believed there will be even more about him in 3.5! And ngl, the hair and the fur scarf are just *happy sigh* And Albedo? Just look at him, so cute! And the voice? Damn, Khoi is talented. And his relationship with Klee and Alice. I have alchemy fam feels aaaaaaaaaaa :') oh, oh! I noticed last night that when Albedo walks, his clothes do this little metal clinking sound and I really like it!

I always get so happy talking about Genshin :D what about you? What's your favorite character? Any favorite events? :D

[imaginefe]

Smh Rio Dimitri's hero art got me feeling soft for him... I'm only at like 106 orbs I ain't got thr funds to be falling in love again...

UGH I FEEL YOU... THIS JUST ISNT FAIR...

but ill pray for u sydney mayhaps youll get him free summon? :3c

[ducktracy]

HI ELIZA i’ve been rewatching the old spongebob seasons one by one and i was just wondering - what would you say would be your favorite pre-first movie SB episode and why? hope you’ve been doing well!

SAMMMMMM!!! it is SUCH A DELIGHT TO HEAR FROM YOU MY FRIEND i hope YOU’VE been doing well too!! THIS IS SUCH A FUN AND GOOD IDEA i REALLY need to do that myself!! i used to be good about watching an episode every day before starting work but have been getting lazy… it feels nice to watch things in non-animatic form LOL BUT UMMMM

this is SO HARD it’s so hard to narrow it down!! i GOTTA go with Texas though—i LOVE THE SOUNDTRACK. country musician Junior Brown provided his original soundtrack (AND I FOUND THE MUSIC TO THIS SCENE!! this scene right here is my favorite sequence in all of SpongeBob i have such a fond attachment to it and i was so happy when i discovered the song a few months ago. that he got to slip in a sample of his own original music is so sweet!) which makes it very unique right off the bat, and steel guitars are one of my very favorite instruments. i grew up listening to a lot of old country like Hank Williams, Bob Wills, Hank Snow, Patsy Cline, Loretta Lynn, etc etc and i still am very much a lover of old country for that reason, and i have a VERY strong nostalgic attachment to that sort of music/steel guitars. SpongeBob i have an equally strong nostalgic attachment to because it was ALL. I. WATCHED. AS. A. CHILD. i’m talking 8 hours a day every day i never ever missed a single episode up until i was around 14 or 15. it is ingrained in my DNA so to have those two nostalgic factors is a very strong NOSTALGIA BOMB to start—and that Sandy’s song is a direct parody of a Hank Williams song is even better! Hank’s one of my favorite musicians of all time so i LOVE IT

I THINK IT HAS A GREAT BALANCE OF HUMOR AND SINCERITY… i don’t even love it for the gags so much as i do its earnesty, but the gags are all VERY FUNNY whether it’s as blunt as “NO I’M TEXAS” or as subtle as a banner saying “HAPPY TEXAS” in the background. i think it’s a very heartwarming cartoon on top of that and has some GORGEOUS visuals—Vincent Waller who storyboarded the episode draws some insanely cute Sponges and i’m still a huge fan to this day.

IT’S JUST LIKE. the ULTIMATE comfort episode. it’s one of the only episodes of a show i have downloaded to my phone that i paid money for because i love it so much. i think it’s unique, it’s one a lot of people rightfully remember, and it has such this strong warmth to it and a great message of togetherness and i just REALLY admire it as a whole, coming from someone who works with these characters daily and their CREATORS daily! i really respect and admire what went into it.

(runners up would be Ripped Pants because it was my favorite as a kid and i would watch it on loop to a very obsessive degree, Plankton! because I Love Plankton, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy II because it’s super nostalgic to me as well and i adore the drawing style, Bubble Buddy, Christmas Who, and The Algae’s Always Greener)

[mfpeace]

@justbeingedgy @weird-colombian-gurl You asked me to elaborate on the "Ches already has a kid" theory in the notes of that one mf analysis post (which I really liked, go check it out!!), so that's why I'm making this one, cuz notes are a bit too restricting for what I want to talk about!

Though next time think twice before asking me to talk about something I'm interested in, because you never know when you're gonna wake up lovecraftian horrors!! :DDD you'll see what i mean when you press read more :))

So, I'll say it right now - this post is largely inspired by the second story highlight of this Instagram user (sorry, I don't know their name, only that their Instagram handle is dee_girl_metalfamilyfan), it's in Russian though, so keep that in mind

Alright, so I'll break this theory into two parts: the first one will be all about Ches, and the second will be about his potential child (spoiler: you might've seen her!)

Without any further ado, let's get to the Ches part:

1. The creators said that they're gonna explore Ches' character in the second season. Obviously, it doesn't mean anything on it's own, but just wait.

Dima: Let's talk about the second season a little. Of course, the seconds season will show development of the old characters, as well as new ones. That's in short. As you see, Ches looks a bit different here.

Alina: Yeah, we'll show a bit more about Ches at the ages of 18 to 20. His past. We'll reveal a bit more about his complex character, as much as it's possible.

(The source of the translation) Also I think they also said at one point that adult Ches will get some character development too? But that's probably a given, considering that we wouldn't see his youth if it wouldn't have affected him in the present, flashbacks without any relevance to the overall story don't sound so good

2. Not sure about this one (we don't know how much in character it was) but I can't not mention it.

Alina: Actually there was this one fanfic that I really liked. I don’t remember what it was called, but it was about Ches having a daughter, which is a cool topic. It was relatively in character and truly interesting. It’s great when people focus not just on sexual relationships of the characters, but also try to look at their development. That was a really interesting one. That’s it.

(UnityCon '19)

3. This one's a pretty big one, in my opinion. So, this is what they said on ArtWave '19:

Dima: Ches also has flaws.

Alina: [to Dima] Don’t spoil stuff.

Dima: His flaw is that he's very... irresponsible, let’s say.

So, maybe, just maybe, Ches does have a child but he, you know... left them? As the Instagram highlight from the beginning say: "he might be irresponsible enough to leave his child, and he's probably irresponsible enough not to use any contraception" (rephrased, not the exact quote)

4. Alright, so, the only mention of this one I can think of right now is the aforementioned Instagram highlight. The Metalfamilyfan says:

I contacted Korg/Корж, (admin of @ metal_yama [and I believe one of the organizers of the Metal Family Meetup in Moscow]) and she asked Alina on one of the meetups: "if Ches were to be a father, what kind of father would he be?"

And she said: "The kind of that would say "kid, look at that birdie over there!" an then he would run away"

Someone's words are not the perfect source, but they did tag Metal Yama and from what I know they didn't disagree with what the author of the page said. if anyone has anything to say about this (disprove or definitely prove what I said) feel free to do so in a reblog, notes, DMs, send me an anonymous ask, or in any other way you feel comfortable with

5. Ches has literally been through the same thing, and we know how important the theme of the cycle of abuse is in Metal Family (or, in this case, the cycle of neglect? Abandonment? Idk)

You managed to hide your PREGNANCY from me! AND you've been hiding the child from me for a whole year!

YES, because you would've insisted on aborting him!

AND NOW I'M INSISTING ON PUTTING HIM UP FOR ADOPTION! OR I'LL LEAVE RIGHT NOW!

6. Here we can see Ches with a blonde girl. Nothing too special, probably just a one time hook up. He doesn't seem to be interested in her, and she seems to be annoyed with him.

But wait...

What is this?

Like, it doesn't even matter if there's actually a punk/rock/whatever band named MOM or not, I just think it's pretty weird to put it in this particular drawing of Ches and this random woman who is implied to have slept with him. It's not integral to Ches' character as, for example, Korol i Shut is. It's just... there. For some reason.

------------

Alright, now, finally let's get to the second part of the theory: who is, exactly, his child?

The short answer is, according to this theory, her:

First, let me list every single instance of her appearing in canon (and by canon I mean everything made by the creators. Even with this definition of canon it's not much, I promise): The screenshot you can see above on the left (it's a screenshot from the second season and it appeared here), an instagram story posted by Alina (above, right), and two drawing with a lot of characters where you can spot the girl which I'm gonna call her PinkHair or PH for short, I'll mention them later I feel like I should mention this, comparing the sources of the images and the dates when they were posted, it's safe to assume that the screenshot in the classroom has the latest and final version of her design. The red hair most likely doesn't mean anything

1. Alright. So. we've seen Dee and PinkHair in a classroom together, so they're most likely related in some way, or at least they know each other. Their exact relationship doesn't matter here, because all that matters here is that they're related story-wise

Let's look at the first image. This is the banner of the main Metal Family channel. Ches is near Heavy (they get along quite well and I'm sure Heavy aspires to be like Ches in many ways), Dee (we can see his classmates/friends near him, they're all about his age), and we can see people related to Glam on the left side of the image (including Ches!), and Vicky's - on the right side (notice how the hell sign is also there)

Now, I'm not absolutely sure about this one, but it's still kind of weird - look at the image on the right (it's from ArtWave 2021 btw) - wouldn't it make more sense to put PinkHair near Dee? Also, Curiously enough, not only is she not close to Dee on this image, but she's also standing next to Ches.

Though this whole thing could be explained by art theory (too many small things in one corner of your drawing isn't great composition wise lol sorry PH) but I still can't quite skip this point

2. Remember the "MOM" lady? Fun fact, she has the exact same pearl earring that PinkHair has on the screenshot.

3. I'll put all similarities with her supposed parents in this point: Mother: * She's also pretty uh.. glam? for the lack of a better word? Or feminine in a traditional sense, yeah I think that's a better way to put it. Like colors they prefer to wear for example, and jewelry. Characters like that aren't common in Metal Family * She's gotta be a blonde. I can't imagine her being anything but blonde. If she manages to maintain that hair color as a brunette I'm just straight up assuming her character arc is gonna be killing God because these kind of people are capable of anything. I fear them with every fiber of my being. * I can't say for sure because of the shading, but it seems like they both have gray eyes, and she also has darker skin compared to most MF characters. Though, it's likely that Mom just applied a lot of fake tan Ches: * We know that Ches for sure has darker skin * AND grey eyes * There's also some possible personality similarities but I'm not sure if you can compare a child to a parent they've never really known in this way

That's about it, I suppose, I hope there isn't that many grammar mistakes and logically unfinished parts and whatnot in this post I forgot to edit lol x) I'm not sure how to end this post other than to remind you guys that almost all the points in this posts are inspired by the "тупая теория" highlight on the dee_girl_metalfamilyfan's Instagram page, so go check them out and subscribe, they post Dee x The Quest Girl fanart and and always credit the artists. Without them this post would be much, much shorter.

Thanks for reading this post, please feel free to let me know your thoughts on this post <3

[chasseuses]

reasons why I love jade leech and why you should too.

yes- my overwhelming love for jade has brought me up to this point. this is just me rambling about jade. i may regret doing this bUT FUCK IT LET'S GIVE THE MUSHROOM MAN SOME LOVE ༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽

NOT GONNA FUCKING LIE BUT THE FIRST TIME THE OCTAVINELLE BANNER THINGY WHEN TWST WASN'T RELEASED I-????

I THOUGHT THE TWINS LOOKED WACK + AZUL

"no way in hell am I gonna stan these two lmaoo they look wack smh"

turns out I was wrong-_;3+4+_(_+($_+($+$(&+$(+$(#+$

I PAID NO FUCKING ATTENTION TO OCTAVINELLE saying to myself that I AM A RIDDLE SIMP THROUGH AND THROUGH

lol but

chapter 3

changed my life

SIR HIS VOICE-- HELLO????????? BRO???_($99#($($($ I HAD LITERAL SHIVERS GO DOWN MY SPINE WHEN I HEARD IT BECAUSE O H G OD

the fact that his exchange with floyd, yes the "ne jeido" "e floyd" thingy, IS ABSOLUTELY SO FUCKINDHDSKDHJSVRJSGDHDDGDJDGDJDGSJDGJSDHJSHSJSJSJDJDJJ J CANT BRRATHE

ok I'll get serious now fuvk

Jade Leech, the vice dorm leader of Octavinelle and the twin brother of Floyd Leech. Founder of the Mountain Lovers club and a fucking adorable dork who loves mushrooms and terrariums.

God knows how I love him so much I can cry over him for weeks.

100/10 seems shady af- looks like he can kill you, and he can. that's kinda hot don't u think so???

bruh, the way he talks about creepy things while smiling all gentlemanly is kinda hot. ik it's weird to be attracted to this but pLEASE-

THIS MAN HAS SHARP TEETH I WILL CRY PLEASE [REDACTED] ME.

HE HAS REALLY REALLY REEEEEALLY NICE EYES‼️ IT'S ONE OF THE BIGGEST REASONS WHY I LOVE HIM SO MUCH‼️( also purple eyeliner hehehe u gotta love him )

His matching earring with Floyd?? Absolutely wonderful. The thought that the both of them have matching earrings i --- cr y a little everytiime.

Also- that darker and longer strand of his hair? I want to play with that, please.

his mf face oh god, do you ever think abt how he could say "I'll gobble you up." in his normal voice and we can't fucking tell if he's serious or joking because of his fucking normal expression oh god gobble me up please-- IM KIDDING OF COURSE, maybe.

He has nice, long, slender hands. Perfect for unprotected h*nd h*lding 😳 GODDAMN I WANT TO HOLD HIS HAND WHEEEJFHEKBFKEHDJFHDKCHKCHKDHCKDHCJ

Also the glove-????? I'D PREFER IT IF HE TOOK IT OFF BUT THAT'S ONE NICE GLOVE YOU GOT THERE 😳

holding hands with him will be a fucking blessing sent directly from the heavens above. pls stan him.

he's an eel. that is all

LOOK AT HIS MF EXPRESSIOFN I A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A SIR-??'?($83)$+#)+")$+_("!$

ok back to the topic-

do you ever think about how-- how he loves mushrooms sm and even founded a club because he likes hunting for them in mountains?? DO YOU EVER THINK ABOUT HOW HE'S PROBABLY ALL ALONE WHILE DOING THAT????????? LET ME INTO THAT CLUB‼️

He likes gazing at stars. Please pleasr please let me gaze at the stars with u sir

He's pretty good with his hands- or so they say 👀 he can cook-- and he draws 👀 you gotta love a man who can use his hands well don't u think so too 👀👀👀

this bitch is 190cm tall. that is all. i want him to tower over me.

"Fufu, I grew up in the deep sea up north. The cold in the freezer feels pretty good." YOU CAN PUT HIM INA FR E R ZER IT'S RLLY RANDOM BUT HE CAN STAND THE COLF WHICH IS A FNKDHFKSBDKSHDJSGDKXHKSGCKSHCKDGXKDHCKDKC

have I mentioned his obsession with mushrooms??? This!! THIS CUTE EEL RAISES HIS MUSHROOMS WITH ALL OF HIS HEART DJDJDNXB ALL THE LOVE AND AFFECTION FOR HIS SHROOMS..... ISN'T HE JUST-???"($(_+($+_ THE CUTEST?????

DO YOU SEE HOW SOFT HE LOOKS???? I WANT HIM TO LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT TOO WTF ༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽

AND THE WAY HIS CHEEKS..... HIS CHEEKS GO SQOOSH GFJSJSHZKHRKDHRJSHD JEIDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽

HIS TALENT IS SERVING TEA‼️‼️ DON'T U WANT SOMEONE AS GENTLEMANLY AND HANDSOME AS JADE TO SERVE U TEA ‼️‼️

Don't you just hate how Jade can go from "I'll have her home by 8" to "Your daughter calls me daddy too" bECAUSE I

I'm not even gonna explain this one.

JUST IMAGINE IF HE,,,,,, IF HE WENT FERAL‼️‼️ I WOULF PAY TO SEE THAY OH MY hjfhdkDHSKDHSKDHKXJDKXHD FERAL JADE E E E E E E E E E

yeah so you know his one voice line that goes "Clothes feel so restrictive… It’s been a while since I came on land, but I’m still not used to them." Yeah then take them off! I won't mind (☞ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)☞

DID I MENTION ABT HIS TERRARIUMS???? I LOVE HIM SO MUCH OH GOD HE'S SO CUTE DO U JUST IMAGIEN HDIFMFEBJFHDNFB FOCUSINDGFJDUFJDNJRNXKDBDKDBDKDJKFDHKXHFKDJDKDK wait jm freaking out

this man.... this man can cook. and that seals the fucking deal for me because 😭

He!! Loves!! His!! Brother!! KFNSKDHKSJDKSHDJD BABY 😭😭💖😭💖💖😭‼️HfbskdhHFKSBFKSBDKSNDN JEIDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

he likes unpredictable things which is why he likes being with floyd all the time i 😔 I'll be unpredictable for u ZjfjsjdJFBDJFND KIDDING

this is floyd's caretaker we're talking about 😭 which means he is husband material ™ DONT CHEAT ON HIM ༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽

or else 👀

did i mention how cute he fucking looks everytime his cheeks go sqoosh because istg I start simping whenever I see it.

ALMOST FORGOT TO ADD BUT LIKE-??? THE WAY HE SAVED MC AND CATER FROM ROOK AND TREY DURING THE BEANDESJD SEVENT I WILL FJDJFJFKDJFJJDHCJDHFKDHFKHFJDCJDHCNDJFBJDHFKDJFJDJFKCIFNCKFBCKFNFKFJKDJFKRBFKDJFKFJJF

KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR HELL YEAH HE'S PERFECT

lastly, i want him to punch me in the face. that's it.

AND I THINK THAT'S IT-??? ( Of course not- i can point out more things i love abt him but like-???? I NEED TO CALM DOWN!! anyways, pls stan jade i love him so much i cr y <3

[virtuouscandlelight]

{ OOC } rambles a lot on inner child shit and why I’m such an anxious depressed piece of shit about everything but how that also created all my talents simultaneously

trigger warnings.

so

mostly all of my talents stemmed from intense trauma and loneliness in my childhood go figure LOL. mainly the voice acting, singing, illustrating, and writing. people tend to say shit I have a good combo of talents but you gotta remember these came with the heaviest cost and that price was such a severe loneliness from bullying and abuse that I had to literally write up my own world and create my own friends just to stay sane since fucking elementary and that’s the only reason why I can say I’m very decent at what I do now

because I had all the free time to perfect shit. I didn’t have friends, kids were RUTHLESS and I grew up in a horrid neighborhood with parents who didn’t really care that much as an only child. I got robbed of my comfort items on the daily at school. I’ve gotten transferred before because I was being bullied that badly. I got thrown into suicidal depression because of all this shit at like 7 years old and I’ve been dealing with that dark illness for 15 years. the kids on the block would physically attack me. parents didn’t really care much. never really saw my other family much. became socially scared and awkward and over apologized for everything because I got told a lot it’s my fault for what happened { still never broke the habit } . never got to fully enjoy family trips. would feel insanely jealous of healthy relationships and I used to actually hate the idea of Disneyland because I thought that was for kids with healthy families enjoying the magic lol

so I’d write stories. a lot. I’d draw pictures on printer paper with written stories about my cats and staple them together, making a book. I’d draw and write in class constantly, creating characters and hyper focusing on them because I couldnt find it in me to focus on myself. id study how to create good characters and give them voices and passions and found comfort in constructing a happier, fantasy world in my mind because reality was fucking horrid and only got worse the older I got. fake friends turned to abusive relationships, death threats, parents got more abusive. created more characters, got into role - playing on Facebook, got bullied there too because I was honest to god a cringe child with MS Paint bases in a Pokémon fandom LOL I NEEDED THAT PUSH I got bullied so much that I actually studied drawing and writing more and ended up becoming a straight A top student or whatever in all my literary classes. teachers would use my poems as examples for the class like actually print it out and hand it to everyone for reference and even though that was neat I really didn’t give a shit because it didn’t stop the bullying.

that’s how I felt with my talents. they’re cool but that doesn’t mean people will like me any better. I’ve missed out on SO MANY opportunities to go farther with my talents but I was bullied so badly that it butchered my self confidence and gave me insane stage fright at a young age. I passed up on being Annie for the school play, I passed up solos in choir, I passed up singing the star spangled banner all because I was terrified of how people would laugh at me. I was deathly afraid of judgement because of it wasn’t from the kids, it was from my parents constantly at home. And, without the confidence and love to rely on myself throughout worsening depression, I had no one but my overactive imagination.

shit if I can’t give life to myself then I’d pour life into my own characters.

and that’s how voice acting and writing came hand in hand I’d pour my heart and soul and loneliness into my creations and I’d give them life by giving them a voice and emotions. and then seeing how Disney characters, show characters, cartoon characters, etc etc do the same where they’re given life through voice and drama, all I ever wanted at that point was to do exactly that for a living and make others feel something.

I want to make people feel what my character is feeling. I want people to feel as though they can reach right through the screen and grab them. I want people to smell the scents, to hear the scenes, to hear the raw emotion, to experience the pain and fear, the euphoria, the pleasure, I want people to feel that exact whimsical, child - make believe feeling I felt all those fucking years of being shamed that saved my life — in my writing and creations. My own characters, my stories, my art, Candlelight, are my own products of Neverland — fantasy, magic. Happiness. It’s why Peter Pan was always my favorite Disney movie too. It made my inner child happy — the child that never got to experience magic. But that movie just felt like magic to me.

boy lemme tell you when I write with someone I love LOVE to use all of that to my advantage. and I go overboard with description I know lol I love writing that much. like shit don’t get me started if I’m hooked on a thread { usually I’ll write LONG replies if I’m invested like crack } and that’s when I start laying in bed acting like a film director HERE’S THE SCENERY GOOD PAINT THAT BITCH LIKE THE MONA LISA BRILLIANT OKAY HERE’S THE THEME THERE’S THE TWO CHARACTERS PROFESSING UNDYING LOVE THAT’LL LEAD INTO EITHER MIND CRUSHING DESPAIR OR MENDING BODIES PLEASURE PERFECT OKAY PAINT THE EXPRESSIONS ADD MORE FLARE AND DRAMA SPLENDID AAAAAND ACTION !

it’s also why I cry at nearly every Disney movie actually, even when it’s not sad ! shit I cry at Peter Pan’s OST and when the children are flying. that childish magic feel just makes me so emotional. I so badly want to give my inner child that childhood magic she deserved. If I could fucking hug my kid self for all the shit they put her through, I’d adopt myself and protect her from the world. It’s hard to enjoy childish things when you’re an adult now — judgement will be ten times harder and I struggle still with learning not to care what others think. Characters in costume get me extremely happy in the most childish way and as badly as I want to interact with them in character back because of my passion for theatrics, I shut down and freeze up on contact out of humiliation. I’ve gotten the nastiest and embarrassed looks before from people when I get too excited and ramble or make excited noises. The Renaissance Faire is my only exception because everyone is in costume and in character but I still freeze up lol as excited as I am to visit Disneyland, I’m also petrified to look like a fool in front of my parents with so many comfort characters. God, what would the actors think seeing a fucking 22 year old cry from inner child healing ? Yikes, right ? I went to this Tim Burton themed bar recently and there was an actor dressed as Jack Skellington — he was interacting with me and I wanted so badly to fool around with him back and ask for a hug but instead I felt myself seize and smiled stupid in silence lol

basically tl;dr I’m only good at my talents because fiction brought me far more comfort than nonfiction ever could and i desperately want to give my inner child would she wants to heal but im way too self conscious in the face of public to give in